“I need help”

In my humble opinion, the three words that’s the hardest to be articulated in this century is not “I love you” anymore.

At least, in my case. And as I am quite a normal human, a decent amount of other humans should relate to me. No? Okay quit reading, you alien.

Take a stroll around social medias and you’ll see people displaying their affections publicly, everywhere. It doesn’t necessarily have to be romantic love, as a quick search on Instagram would show:

Just as a comparison and this is getting a little irrelevant but whatever:

You see my point?


“Help” involves two parties, and is always transferred through an action from an entity to another entity in a myriad of ways, to lighten the burden of the receiver.

Lol screw my life this is getting more complicated the more I ponder upon it. Ugk. I should be sleeping!!


Anyway, I kinda just wanna say that a lot of people have huge egos nowadays because of, well, probably society but there are a million other possibilities and they think that asking for help is embarrassing that’s why they don’t do it and then stress themselves and burn themselves out and tada mental illnesses come and your life is probably ruined if you still didn’t ask for help when your mind is screwed. Woof, what a long sentence.

What I also notice is, people love to help.

“Excuse me, could you please carry my suitcase to the upper compartment?” – life as a tiny Asian in an European train built for giant Europeans

Hi, may I know where’s the toilet? – when you’re mostly lazy and occasionally blind to locate the toilet signs

Excuse me, could you tell me how do I get to XXX?” – when you have Internet but want to interact with the locals

“Hey could you please help me find out the requirements for XXX university? – when you wanna study but actually don’t want to

“Hey can you please come to my house and help me mop the floor?” – I did this multiple times before and it always works

“I can’t decide what to eat. Help me. ” – not exactly useful but people try all the time, trying is better than not trying


You right now: But what you mentioned above is what I would say too given the circumstances.

Me: Yeah if you couldn’t even do those, you badly need help right now to overcome your antisocial-ness and/or shyness and/or whatever.


Those are pretty minor stuff, if you noticed. What I’m trying to convey here is that we all should learn to ask for help too for more serious matters. Matters that require you to lower your ego to perceive the network around you more equally.

When you’re at the same level, help is transferred more easily without much friction. But when you think that you have different power dynamics, haha shit, good luck taming your ego monster.


Struggling with your studies though you’ve consistently aced exams all your life?

“I need help”

Need financial help for something important in your life?

“I need help”

Mentally breaking down?

“I need help”

Need help in general?

“I need help”


Don’t feel ashamed. More often than not, it’s only you yourself who has high expectations on yourself, no one else really cares. But they love to help. Let them help.


My name is Kwan Wei Yen and I need help.

My dad’s pretty cool, uh.

I’m not sure how many people would describe their dad like that, but I definitely would, over and over again. I’d even convince you that your dads are less than mine but nah, everyone’s definition of a ‘great dad’ is fundamentally different and perhaps to you, mine is the worst dad on Earth. Your opinion is not of my concern.

***

He granted me two gap years. Gap years are generally unheard of in the part of the world where I come from, let alone someone who could have two. Yeah, I’m starting university late; yeah, I’m not working and spending his money; but you know what? He doesn’t care what you think. I thought training myself to not give a f*** on what people think is a pretty cool thing to do, yet now I think having a dad who doesn’t give a f*** is one of the best things in the world.

He literally supports everything that my brother and I set out to do, as much as he could, emotionally and financially. He really helps us to carve out our lives as closely as we envisioned it to be. Honestly, life is great without restrictions imposed by parents because he believes in us that much.


 

Today, he woke up pretty late because ‘it felt very good to sleep in’. I bought him brunch from the meagre amount of money I managed to earn from my not-exactly-working business, he smiled like a kid when I said that I was getting the bill. He left me queuing alone in the long line at IKEA while wandering around the warehouse like a kid. He almost squealed when he saw the poster of ‘The Incredibles 2’ and exclaimed “I want to watch that!” (he usually avoided cartoons).

I guess it’s tolerable since it’s technically his day.

First and foremost

Hi, this post opens the blog officially, so this is a virtual opening ceremony!

Damn do I not like myself; it took me more than a month to finally write the first bloody post on this site…procrastination rocks!

The initial idea of this blog is actually for it to be more philosophical but screw it, I’ll just write whatever I desire. As I also plan to delete my Facebook account in the (hopefully near) future, this would be a platform for me to bitch about things and share what I’m currently up to in my life.

Look at that bloody high ego. Who the deuce even cares about my life and what I have to say about things? Yeah I know, that’s why I don’t really like myself. It’s a pretty weird statement to make and I guess I should elaborate on it. Basically, I have been reading about stoicism a lot, because I am SO done with conventional faiths (sorry to a lot of you people).

I read a quote that went something like: “I know myself too well to like myself.” WOW, right. Yeah I don’t really like myself anymore, I wish that I was a better person than what I convey. I recently learnt about the Japanese concept of tatemae and honne. In a nutshell, tatemae means how people see you on the surface; whereas honne is what truly is in you. I suspect that a lot of Japanese don’t like their honnes too.

Even so, I am a normal human being who craves to be liked, so nope, I would not expose the dark sides of me so soon.  *evil grin*

So, welcome to my blog, where I write things in mostly English that might make you laugh/angry/cry/whatever.

Also, please like me for as long as you could!

You might not agree with my mode of thinking but that’s what this blog is for anyway, inspiring intellectual arguments so we can all advance metaphysically.

Please feel free to comment anything as I do appreciate constructive feedbacks! My grammars and language use are not perfect so yeah thank you in advance for pointing my errors out. 🙂

Yours truly,

Wei Yen

Puchong, MALAYSIA