First and foremost

Hi, this post opens the blog officially, so this is a virtual opening ceremony!

Damn do I not like myself; it took me more than a month to finally write the first bloody post on this site…procrastination rocks!

The initial idea of this blog is actually for it to be more philosophical but screw it, I’ll just write whatever I desire. As I also plan to delete my Facebook account in the (hopefully near) future, this would be a platform for me to bitch about things and share what I’m currently up to in my life.

Look at that bloody high ego. Who the deuce even cares about my life and what I have to say about things? Yeah I know, that’s why I don’t really like myself. It’s a pretty weird statement to make and I guess I should elaborate on it. Basically, I have been reading about stoicism a lot, because I am SO done with conventional faiths (sorry to a lot of you people).

I read a quote that went something like: “I know myself too well to like myself.” WOW, right. Yeah I don’t really like myself anymore, I wish that I was a better person than what I convey. I recently learnt about the Japanese concept of tatemae and honne. In a nutshell, tatemae means how people see you on the surface; whereas honne is what truly is in you. I suspect that a lot of Japanese don’t like their honnes too.

Even so, I am a normal human being who craves to be liked, so nope, I would not expose the dark sides of me so soon.  *evil grin*

So, welcome to my blog, where I write things in mostly English that might make you laugh/angry/cry/whatever.

Also, please like me for as long as you could!

You might not agree with my mode of thinking but that’s what this blog is for anyway, inspiring intellectual arguments so we can all advance metaphysically.

Please feel free to comment anything as I do appreciate constructive feedbacks! My grammars and language use are not perfect so yeah thank you in advance for pointing my errors out. 🙂

Yours truly,

Wei Yen

Puchong, MALAYSIA

medical advices are so confusing

or maybe it’s just in Germany. or maybe because i’ve only needed help here in Germany. but wow.

anyway:


physiotherapist: go to your doctor and get referrals to come here again

me: i want to go to physiotherapy again

doctor: nope you’re going to an orthopaedic cos you shouldn’t need physiotherapy anymore


psychologist or counsellor lol idek who cos the mental health industry in Germany is even more confusing: you need to go to psychotherapy

me: i want to go to psychotherapy

doctor: nope you need a psychiatrist


at this point i’m not even sure if i have that many problems. but if anyone was asking, my university life is going great.

2019 reflections + 2020 resolutions

threw a spontaneous NYE party with seven other friends and thought it would be fun to compile “best of” lists. that list is only for us to know, heh. then we did some reflections then some resolutions. after that we played games and got drunk. i don’t get how 10 persons managed to use 18 mugs/glasses but also i used three different ones for different beverages (wow).


2019 REFLECTIONS

(got these questions online while i was planning for the party, please pardon the sequence that doesn’t make sense)

an unexpected surprise last year: that i won a scholarship despite horrible academics results in the previous semester. however, the scholarship is awarded to students who engage themselves socially, a lot. hah.

best advice i heard last year: watch your mouth.

best thing i learned last year: to execute some basic life functions with my left hand. i still brush my teeth and eat with my left hand.

one word to describe last year: dramatic.

biggest regret last year: i fucked up something.

an unexpected obstacle last year: broken right arm and completely-torn right knee ligament at the same time.

best place i visited last year: Verona, Italy.

most excited for this this year: ironically but honestly, university.

most challenging thing last year: at one point after my accident, i had problems with my physical health, mental health (had anxiety and depression), emotional health, with some people i hold dear, with exam stress because i was very far behind classes because i missed a lot of classes due to poor mental and physical conditions, with a new job as a student research assistant at a university institute, and i had to manage a student association. i was literally operating with a broken arm, broken ligament, broken brain, and broken heart, at the same time. somehow i pulled through…

most grateful for last year: …thanks to friends who stuck around.

most inspiring person i met last year: will it be very narcissistic to nominate myself for this? cos i would actually be very impressed and inspired if i met someone who went through those shits like me; because despite having a terrible time most of the semester, the semester ended as if nothing bad happened. omitting the (extremely) negative aspects, i actually had a great semester, well, academically. and financially. this might be material for another blog post that ive been trying to work on.

my biggest achievement of 2019: having written the best paper in an exam; also, best grade to date!

funniest moment of the year: there probably were a lot cos i do a lot of dumb things/ do a lot of things dumbly but the one that came to my mind was the moment when i was on the operation theatre for my RIGHT arm surgery, alone and scared, and they nearly operated my left arm cos that was stated on the document.

place i want to visit this year: Poland. Turkey.

best moment of the year: couldn’t decide…


2020 RESOLUTIONS

these are quite vague because i need my privacy.

  • journal every day.
  • save money; get my finances straight.
  • be physically and mentally fit enough to go to the moon.
  • listen to a podcast every week.
  • spend more time alone.
  • eat my ego.
  • finish reading the books on the shelf.
  • not destroy the left side of my body.
  • try to churn out at least one blog post per month. a real post, not a reading journal. very unrealistic in the first three months because of exams…

    PS: HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Sunday. Aachen. it’s rainy again but it was quite sunny a few days ago

the Christmas break started and i was in my room for more than 40 hours and i thought today was still Saturday. silly me. started watching Halt And Catch Fire with class genius and made a lot of pancakes and cooked noodles too. my new place is cosy. feeling slightly under pressure because there are a lot to be done this holiday season. wish me luck. but somehow im still reading random things rather than doing productive work. smh.

READ

someone found some female remains at a supposedly male-only Geek mountain. what kind of stupid rule is that. people used to be so weird and dumb

the strange life and death of a genius programmer. stumbled upon a few articles about blockchain technology recently but was too tired or energyless to document it here but here is one.

here is another one about a cryptocurrency scam thing where the founder of the company allegedly faked his own death.

and now people want to exhume his body. hmmmmmmmmmm

watermelon

a writing challenge with a friend. procrastinated for two months and finally wrote it while being layover in Istanbul without WiFi. 


Once upon a time, there was a Melon Water. Mr Water was born in South Africa and grew up in one of the most affluent families there. The Waters was the biggest exporter of watermelons in South Africa and Melon was the only heir to the family business. However, like every story worth writing about, Melon didn’t care about melons, maybe because his name reminded him too much of it. 

He grew to especially despise watermelons because he was always selected to represent his class in the school’s annual watermelon-eating competition. The year he won, he was accused of eating his own kind and got laughed at. The years he lost, he was mocked at for losing to normal humans and got laughed at. Sometimes when the family had a vacation at a country where the last name is stated before the first name, there would be muffled laughs as he crossed custom controls. His family’s financial wealth clearly didn’t guarantee Melon Water a great social status, therefore as he grew older, the more he found that money was useless and he became a very known squanderer. Oh wells, his family had the means to let him do whatever he wanted, since money was technically a renewable resource to them, since it’s so easy to grow watermelons. 

As he approached adulthood, Melon Water’s parents started urging him to study business administration at a university so that he could prepare to take over the watermelon empire his great great great granddad built. Melon refused to. Then his parents threatened to cut his financial aids. Then Melon complied reluctantly. 

On the first day of university, Melon fell in love at the first sight with a girl who only wished to identify herself as Ms Sugar. Afraid that he would leave a bad first impression with his real full name, he decided to call himself Mr Water. Sugar didn’t see a problem. And so Water and Sugar started seeing each other. Sugar was a damned good student and to impress her, Melon started studying very hard too in the name of love. They were the two best students in the degree course. Papa Water and Mama Water were really pleased and recruited Ms Sugar into their company too after their graduation. Melon and Ms Sugar worked surprisingly well together and even grew the business too include growing and selling berries. 

Soon, it’s time to talk about marriage. Ms Sugar whelped and said yes. The thing was, Melon still addressed his soon-to-be wife as “Ms Sugar” or sometimes more affectionately,  “Su”. They both decided that, while registering for their marriage at the city council, they would both come out to each other with their first names. Both were no longer worried that the other would ridicule them. 

The day has finally arrived and as they both glanced at the marriage certificate, they burst into laughter. On the paper, it stated “Husband: Mr Melon Water; Wife: Ms Watermelon Sugar”. 

Watermelon’s parents were young and dumb and were addicted to the Harry Style’s song when she was born and somehow decided that it was a name that makes sense. Their first names gave them even more the reason to connect with each other and they lived happily ever after. 

friday. Selangor. meh.

had an impromptu music party last night and i think i’ve finally slid into holiday mood though it’s been eight weeks and i’m going back to reality in two weeks. oh wells.

READ

stop using public USB charging ports

how to tell if you’re a jerk. yeah and also an asshole.

a female serial killer

how to enjoy studying. tbh i didn’t even enjoy the article. but i must say it may be useful

how to rant. nice piece

a Malaysian short animated film that’s been critically acclaimed internationally

monday. Malaysia. well at least i can still sweat

apparently it’s gonna snow in Aachen!!! physiotherapy is getting tougher and tougher, the knee feels like it’s back to square one after every session.

READ

a lot of women used to use arsenic to kill their husbands. for some reason i regard serial killers who killed with poison to be in another category than other serial killers, like their killings bring less weight cos their hands weren’t dirty. gosh for a squeamish person i sure do like gruesome details. 

someone wrote “How To Murder Your Husband” then might have really murdered her husband

some cold hard truths about the workplace. well well well

someone took the MIT poker course and went to play a tournament. mathematics is everywhere hmm. still don’t get poker but very interesting.

a piece of philosophy that proves that we cannot always be sure about what we think we know. i actually thought this was a kind of common sense and this article delves deeper than my thinking about the matter

friday. Malaysia. it rained.

hello welcome to the peak of my emotional rollercoaster!!! life seems to be hopeful!!

READ

things that people listed as “hobbies” on their CVs. wow. these people are bold.

how learning programming can help with mental health. hmm interesting. all the more motivated to learn coding now.

woah Nike sounds scary for budding female athletes

data engineer vs data scientist

words that have no English equivalent. hahahhahahahahah fun

50 ways to be ridiculously generous. yeap. ridiculous. some are quite nice though